My friend Sancho

As I walked into my room the other day, I saw Sancho sitting in the corner. And although it had been quite some time since I last saw Sancho, I really shouldn't have been surprised - given his habit of showing up in my room at odd times - when he's least expected (and least wanted as well!)

Seeing him there that day took me back to H11 A#70 where I first made friends with Sancho.
I had just shifted to a swanky new single room at the hostel, had decided the where the bed, the cupboard and the table should go, had arranged all my belongings neatly (:)) and was just settling down to admire my new room, when I first heard his voice and then saw Sancho.

My first reaction was disgust. Then anger - at having to share my new room with Sancho. But there was nothing much I could do.
Although Sancho and I never could get along from day one, we had this unsaid, unwritten treaty of having our own ends of the room. And we both respected that treaty...I never ventured near Sancho's part of the room - from the window to the cupboard (Well, at least never went there whenever I knew Sancho was around) and always ensured I came back to my part of the room as soon as (as soon as was humanly possible ) I had fetched whatever I wanted from the cupboard :-|
To his credit, Sancho never tried to encroach my end of the room either - from the door to the bed.

After a lot of initial disgust and (futile) attempts to reclaim my room, I gave up and resigned myself to the fact that I better accept Sancho's presence.

Slowly, I came to depend on Sancho's (always) being there.
Late nights - when I was up fighting with some algo problem - Sancho was there. Sancho kept me company as I struggled to make sense of the innumerable symbols jotted down in my machine learning notes. When I used to come back from my lab after a night of squashing code bugs and still lie awake from anxiety of the unresolved bugs, Sancho used to be there - he knew the joy and pain of squashing bugs too.

I never realised when I started taking his presence for granted...until one day, (although I can't recollect exactly when) Sancho was no longer to be seen. He stopped visiting.
I took a few days to realize Sancho was missing, because I thought he'll obviously come back soon enough.

But my friend Sancho never came back - at least not until I was at H11A#70.

So imagine my surprise when I saw Sancho again, after almost two years, at my room in Pune - sitting in the corner - just like old times!

I didn't question Sancho regarding his whereabouts nor did Sancho ask me how I was doing...It was like when old friends meet after a long time - you don't question, you don't explain, you just start back together from where you had left off...
This was what happened - only this time I didn't want Sancho to stay for long...

Oh, btw, I really should have posted a pic of Sancho, but he's really really shy and doesn't like posing for pictures. So you will have to do with one of his pics I found on google (Yeah, my friend Sancho is quite famous you see :) )

PS: The post's title is dhapofied from the title of a book my friend M had. (It also had a pic of Sancho on its cover :) )
PPS: I really really hope Sancho doesn't take a liking to my new room and goes away real soon :P

Stack Overflow...Or not...

I had one of my #philosophical moments the other day.
There was just too much going on all of a sudden, and I felt like life was taking me on a super tizzying giant wheel, spinning away so fast that everything around was just a daze, and I could barely hold on and keep myself from falling off.
Round. Round. Round. Round it went...People, Events, Mishaps, Happenings, News, Celebrations, Facts, Hearsays, Snide Comments, Meetings, Petty Politics, Emails, and Yet more Events, People and Happenings. Whew!
It was pretty hard to keep a track of all that was on my mind...and I got around to being even more forgetful and confused than ever...:-|
This "stack" of things on my mind had really started getting the better of me.
Then I realized that the best way to deal with all of this "too much happening all at once" feeling is to deal with the topmost feeling in my head and sort it out. Simple. Call this.pop(). Deal with it. Do it till you feel a bit better. :)
Guess this is what most people usually do, knowingly or unknowingly...

while (_confused){
_dealwith = this.pop();
if (feeling_better)
break;
}
Note: This assumes that you will feel better before your mind stack gets empty and hence isn't included as the breaking condition :P

And I realized that more often than not, it's not that important workitem assigned to you, or your finance sheet, or that house hunt, or your health in general, or even your family troubles that actually bother you.
When you do call this.pop(), you'll realise that the topmost item bothering you is usually made of much much smaller (and dealable) stuff - the status email@work you have been meaning to send to your mentor, the electricity bill due in a few days, the property ad on sulekha you have been planning to long reply to, the neck pain you have long been ignoring, the visit to your granny you had planned for last week and postponed...the disarray on your workdesk, the umbrella that needs oiling, the gift voucher you won and never en-cashed because you couldn't decide which book on your wishlist to buy, the haircut you've postponed since eternity, that call from your friend you missed and then completely forgot to call back, the birthdays of near and dear ones, the new backpack you promised you'll get your maid for her kid's new school term, the refund from your cancelled ticket you never got and need to follow up with the booking agent, the trip you've always been planning, the blog posts that merely sit as idea bullets in your evernote list...I could go on and on and on...but you get the point...:)
So, without meaning to sound preachy, just call this.pop() and resolve the thing that's bothering you the most.
Take a bet, it'll be easier than you think ;-)

...And thus ends my feverish 'filosofical' bout.

Prejudices!

Some days back, I don't remember how exactly, but I came across the line,

"Prejudices are also cages, very subtle and self created. First we create them, then becoming imprisoned in them, we lose all capacity to fly in the open sky of truth..."

and it brought back memories of a rainy Sunday afternoon, guess I was in the 3rd or 4th standard, and a handwriting competition in a distant school I had attended.

My favorite green and gold 'China' pen. A single sheet of paper to write on, one that you aren't suppose to smudge and the wooden benches in an alien school. They had given a printed sheet of Osho's para that we were supposed to copy in the best handwriting. (Ah, good old days!) :D

And I distinctly remember not understanding much of it, especially the word 'prejudice'. I had read the para over and over, never quite understanding the crux, so much so that the above lines somehow are still written indelibly in my mind (perhaps with the same green China pen too). The lines came flooding back to memory the moment I read it somewhere, some days ago.

Back then, I was trying to mull over how 'prejudice' (an alien word to me then) and a bird in a cage could be related, but it confounded my eight year old self.

I also remember having stashed that sheet of paper somewhere in my drawer for safekeeping. (I still have it somewhere, but it's easier finding stuff on google (this is the link) than delving in my old cupboard) :-P ;-)

Here goes :
"While returning from my morning walk, I saw a bird in a cage. It reminded me of people imprisoned in prejudices.

Prejudices are also cages, very subtle and self created. First we create them, then becoming imprisoned in them, we lose all capacity to fly in the open sky of truth.

And just now I see a kite flying in the sky. What freedom, what a liberation in its flights! One is a bird in a cage, the other a bird in flight in the open sky, symbolic of two different states of mind.

Those who are liberated, fly in the sky of truth, but neither are any footprints left behind, nor is any path created... there is no readymade path, everybody has to create his own path to truth..."
~Osho

Amen to that.

Dream(s)

You paint a dream.
Vivid. Colourful. Lively.
You use up all the patterns and techniques you've learnt. You put in the hues you've thought up till now. You practice it over and over.
Till its near perfect. Almost. Perfect.
You put in all of your heart in it. All of your mind. All of your soul. Till it becomes almost synonymous with you. Your existence. Your breath. The boundaries between your dream and your self blur.
It is a work of a lifetime. A dream of a lifetime.

Shiny. Sparkling. Fragile.
It shatters.

What do you do?
You dream another dream.
Equally vivid. Equally close to your soul. Equally 'you'.

Its OK to fail after you have tried all you could. Because you can always try again. Failure is not fatal. So long as you are true to yourself and know that you tried your best.

PS: This post is the result of a late night show of the movie "Bombay Talkies". ;-)
I especially loved the last story in it, and this post an interpretation of that last story.

Its a story where a father teaches his son the 'importance' of failure, the fact that sometimes however truly you might try, there are chances you might fail.

An awesome awesome story. Awesome lyrics (सब्र की मीठी चाशनी में भिगो के, वक़्त खड़ा है मर्तबान में ले के...) Awesomely scripted. Awesomely shot. Loved it!

Epiphanies and self-realizations...

Came across this somewhere and had to put it here...
It so reminds me of what my mom often times chides me for! :-|

There's one sad truth in life I've found
While journeying east and west -
The only folks we really wound
Are those we love the best.
We flatter those we scarcely know,
We please the fleeting guest,
And deal full many a thoughtless blow
To those who love us best.
~Ella Wheeler Wilcox

#Epiphanies and self-realizations, I would call it.

What Dreams are made of...

Image taken from somewhere on the Internet.
(read: I don't remember the link, so can't cite :P )

Purple Haze
Golden Glaze
Emerald Silk
of a butterfly's wings

Inky Mist
Silver Dust
Crimson Rays
of a setting sun

Orange Velvet
Yellow Fields
Translucent Drops
of morning dew

Burnt Barks
Brown Clods
Green Leaves
of a tender shoot

Dusky Clouds
Grey Winds
Electric Bolts
of lightning too

Sunny Horizons
Blue Ships
Black Silhouettes
of flocking birds

Many Hues
Many Cues
So many things to say and do
Are these what make up
your Dreams too?

~Written on 20th March 2013 #Original

PS: The post's title is "inspired" by a Hilary Duff song of the same name...:)

Sharp Edges and Blunt Corners...

Have you ever hurt your toe or little finger against a particularly rough furniture edge? Ouch! Stings and hurts like hell, especially if the furniture is new, or its arrangement is new and you keep on bumping into the same corner and hurting the same toe, every now and then. Neither do you seem to learn your way about that particular corner, nor does the edge seem to blunt over time (even if you and others in the family have been hurt by it like a zillion times :( )

Sometimes, I think certain traits in our personalities can be like these rough furniture edges, you keep on hurting others (and yourself too) against them, again and again.
Bump. Sting. Curse. Ouch. Glare. Get by.
Never seeming to lose that sharp edge which cuts and hurts and keeps on aching sometimes for days together. It's almost like your very own bitter armour that you wear in the hope that it'll eventually protect you. But it never seems to do so...unless - you accept that the armour isn't what it seems to be, and is in fact your "furniture edge" - a sharp edge capable of stinging and bleeding people who are unfortunate enough to venture near and hurt themselves...unless - you accept that the "edge" is a problem and decide to do something about it, lest you keep on hurting people near you.

Wonder what's the solution? Waiting for this edge to blunt over a period of time, or try and be more conscious of our "rough edges" and avoid hurting people (and ourselves too) in the first place?

Hmm...think think think!

PS: Daemnn!! I have been suffering from the "rough edge" syndrome lately, and this is probably my guilt getting the better of me...*sigh* :-| ;-)
Guess its time to go and fix things up :-))